Today Rudy and I are leaving for the sunshine state of California. I will be so glad to leave the snow and cold of Cleveland behind for a week. The plan is to visit our daughters, who coincidentally, both live on the West Coast seven hours apart. (California is a really really big state). I haven't seen my MG in about 3 years and have never visited her in Ca. Rudy's Mindy was home for Christmas, but she's just moved into a new home which he's never seen. He's pumped, excited, ready for action. When I called him this morning he answered his phone singing "I'm leavin on a jet plane...." Pretty scary stuff. He's planned the routes, printed out paperwork, and he's chompin' at the bit to get rolling.
Me? I'm scarred to death. Didn't even want to get out of bed this morning. Panic stricken and unable to eat, I await my fate with great trepidation. You see, I don't like to travel. I hate airports, and all kinds of ground transportation. Crowds make me crazy(er). I'd rather walk than ride/drive. I want to be in California, not spend the day getting there. I want to hike in the National Forest with MG and Rudy. I can't wait to give MG a big smushy hug. But I don't want to GO there. Doesn't have to make sense, because feelings and emotions seldom do.
And another thing. This is our first trip together as a couple. I've spent years carefully selecting and weeding through friendships to find a perfect travel partner. Her name is Michelle. (I love you kiddo!) I'm not good at the 24/7 kind of life, so I have no idea how Rudy and I will do as partners this coming week. That unknown, terrifies me. I love him, and I'm hoping we travel together as well as we hang together. I don't know where he gets his confidence from. He always knows everything is going to be just fine. I still keep looking up at the sky waiting for that shoe to drop on my head.
He won't like this blog entry, but he'll read it and try to understand. He's pretty good at talking me down from the ledges in life. Maybe I should live on the ground level instead of on the seventh floor. (That would be funny, if it weren't so full of truth.)
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2 comments:
Concerns involving 'first time events' are normal babe. My favorite poem 'Desiderata' says "don't distress yourself with imaginings". Those are sage words of wisdom, and the reason I usually think things will work out fine.
Everyone handles things differently, so your uneasy feelings are what makes you, you. Time will straighten things out.
Enjoy living on the ground floor. It keeps you planted firmly on the ground.
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